My Daughter Said She'd Burn This Book! -- by L. David Mark


Chapter 146 - Grandkid Tales


      As Art Linkletter (Iím sure some of you remember him) used to say, "Kids say the darndest things!" Well, my grandkids are no slouch in this department & here are a few examples:

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Marriage and the Gene Pool

The occasion:
Sometime during the summer of 2008 when my daughter Cindy and her family were visiting us.
The characters:
Noah, my oldest grandaughter, age 9 at the time;
Maggy, her 8-year-old sister;
Yonah, her 5-year-old brother.

Cindy recorded verbatim the following conversation between Yonah and Noah:

      Yonah: "Noah, when I grow up, Iím gonna marry Maggy."
      Noah: "You canít marry Maggy."
      Yonah: "Why not?"
      Noah: "Itís against the law."
      Yonah: "Why?"
      Noah: "Even God would be angry if you married Maggy."
      Yonah: "Why?"
      Noah: "Because your gene pool would be too small."
      Yonah: "You mean I would be too small?"
      Noah: "No. Your gene pool would be too small."
      Yonah: "Maggy would be too small?"
      Noah: "No. Your gene pool would be too small."
      Yonah: "What do you mean?"
      Noah: "Your gene pool would be too small."
      Yonah: "Whatís a gene pool?"
      Noah: "Itís like what makes you have brown hair and brown eyes. And if you married Maggy, then no one in the world would have brown hair and brown eyes. Maybe theyíd have white hair and white eyes. Maybe."
      Yonah: "Ewww!"
      Noah: "Yes, you see. Itís gross."

      Yonah then came to Cindy and said, "When I grow up, Iím going to marry somebody, just anybody, and Iím going to eat all the chocolate I want!"

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How Big Is My Room?

     More recently (summer of 2009) Cindy told me that one day Tal (her youngest son at three-and-a-half years old) came up to her and asked -- not in an accusing way, but just as a question -- "How come my room is smaller than my younger sisterís?"

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Growing Old With Difficulty

      And in October 2009, I called Cindy & after a few minutes, she said, ďDo you want to talk to Noah?Ē

      ďSure,Ē I said. And after chatting for a while with Noah (sheíll be 11 this December), Mary came in the room & started jumping up & down about something I had done -- or failed to do -- I canít remember which.

      When Noah overheard her taking me to task, she said, ďI hope I wonít be that difficult when I grow up!Ē

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